My Quarantine Thoughts

White blood cells are an important part of the immune system as they fight infections by attacking bacteria, viruses, et cetera et cetera. Most of the time, for most people they are really good at what they do. Other people, however, are not quite so lucky ( me included).

Let me elaborate. In the past 5 or six months I have been to the hospital for all manner of things; sinus infections, throat inflammations, the usual persistent cough, mixed growth bacterial infections... You get the idea. My White blood cells; not so good at their job. I'm not faulting them or anything, but you would think by now I'd have gotten the hang of receiving bad news relating to medical issues. Unfortunately, I don't think anything or anyone could have prepared me for this news. So, let's get into it. What goes hand in hand with being sick all the time? A myriad of doctor visits, right. And as I previously mentioned I have been unwell quite a bit. So, naturally, I was in the hospital on numerous occasions. Now, usually, the hospital is the place where sick people go to get better, and don't usually imagine getting sick!! Well, you can, therefore, imagine my surprise when on return from one of those hospital visits, my mother comes rushing home to tell me that I have to go back to the hospital. Not for results of the blood test, I had just taken, but to be tested for CORONAVIRUS!!! Yes, that's right. I was exposed to the virus at one of my many doctor's appointments where it was not a patient who had brought the disease in, but one of the nurses had had it. Did I mention I had gone to that hospital roughly 15 times? And been to TRIAGE approximately the same number of times ( you know, where the NURSES check your vitals).

With that in mind, imagine how dreadful the long car ride to the hospital must have been. Not only was I battling with the fact that I was on my way to be tested for COVID-19, but we also had to rush to get to the hospital before a 7;00 PM curfew because a hospital administrator had called my mother and told her that I had to go back to the hospital immediately. We get there, do the normal hospital stuff and then the doctor says that my mother has to fill admission forms for me to stay at the hospital because I was "High risk!!!". I'm pretty sure I blacked out because I do not remember anything else that came out of his mouth. Thankfully, I didn't have to stay at the hospital as they agreed to have me quarantine at home and go back the next day for testing. Skipping all the boring details of that long, draining, and torturous (because they stick a Q-tip like stick into your nose and another one in your throat) day at the hospital getting tested, I was now in 14-day quarantine in my bedroom.

Well, while in quarantine there are the usual questions; "What do I do with myself?", "How do I fill the time". Which soon becomes; "When can I leave this place?" ( For me it was asking my mom if we can paint a starry night on the ceiling) or " when can I see -(whoever it is you miss)? ", "Oh! I'm bored. Can I jump on the bed?". While it is difficult going through the seclusion; the housekeeper leaving the food outside your door, face-timing your mom who's in the next room or even not being able to be in the same room as your dogs, the hardest part is definitely the deep dark place that your mind goes when you have nothing to do all day and the realization hits that there is a possibility that you have a disease that has been killing people and could possibly also kill you ( because of aforementioned white blood cells that don't really pack a punch), and then your mind goes back to when the doctor said that you were " HIGH RISK!" and then that goes on loop in your mind until the housekeeper knocks on your door again for lunch and you snap out of it. I soon realized I needed more pastimes; you know, jumping on the bead, getting lost in the fantasy of a good book, watching your mom and cousin wash the dog from your bedroom window, spying on your neighbor and critiquing his landscaping choices and napping about 10 times a day and then watching movies in the dead of night because you took to many naps during the day.

Anyway, all that to say, I am fine now ( I didn't get COVID-19). However, I have also been thinking about what Robert Frost said " Some say the world will end in fire, Some say in ice. From what I've tasted of desire, I hold with those who favor fire. But if it had to perish twice, I think I know enough of hate To say that for destruction ice is also great. And would suffice." There are many things in this world that can kill us, end the world, and so on. There's no doubt about that. However, there is something magical in that, the way we choose to live our lives (as optimists or otherwise) can make this harder or easier. Mother nature will run her course and whatever will be will be. So, don't waste time stuck on the maybes and the what-ifs. Take life one day at a time, be positive, and stay safe. ALL WILL BE WELL.